The Fish Tank

Wings don't grow overnight. Thank goodness. We work so hard to build strong roots in our children. It seems daunting to have to let them go and allow them to spread their wings one day. How do we even do it? How do we let them go when the time has come? I cannot even think about this without welling up. It seems so very hard. It's amazing how easily we get wrapped up in the moment we are living. All I know is being a mama. It's like I was never anything else. I was always mom. I can't remember much of life before these boys entered my life and completely wrecked it in a good way. What else is there, anyway? I like to watch other mamas mom. I am inspired and learn so much when I stand back and observe other moms in action. There is nothing like a mother. Thankfully, I am blessed to have women in my life that are a little ahead of me on this mothering adventure. I have watched them launch kids into the world over the past few years. What I noticed was that those win...

Anyone struggle in the parenting realm? I wish I had the hand-raising emoji. I have a feeling we would all be raising our hands. Like any mom, I struggle in all the things motherhood. Just name a day of the week and I can tell you a struggle. We all struggle as moms. Even if we have our mom-game down, we still have our moments. I could write a ten-page blog about all my struggles. But, for the sake of time, I will only chat about one. When I got pregnant with my first-born, I was getting my Masters degree. I thought I would work forever. I had always worked and liked the feeling of contributing to society and financially to our home. I remember talking to a friend when I was about seven months pregnant. He told me I was going to want to quit after I had the baby. In that moment, I knew for certain he was wrong. And then, my baby was born. I had quite a bit of time off with the way my schedule landed, so I didn't go back to work until he was five months old. I was dreading it (a...

I am a recovering perfectionist. Weeellll, I can't honestly say I'm recovered, but I am working on getting there. I did have to do about a bazillion things and get them all perfectly in order before I could sit down and write today. So there's that. I have always chased perfection. Ever since I was little, I have had a longing for everything to be in its place; including my life. My lovies had a particular place on my bed. The knick-knacks and barbies all had a home. When I got married, my husband used to mess with my throw pillows because I had to have them in a certain order. I usually can't sit down until everything is picked up and put away. When something in my life goes wrong, I react illogically and emotionally and typically clean and organize like a mad woman. It's my fantasy for control. Perfection is not attainable this side of Heaven. I was on a walk admiring the scenery around our town lake. Everything grows naturally. There are so many types of pl...