Well, tomorrow is gaining on me quickly even though it feels light years away. Our appointment for genetic counseling is tomorrow at 10am Texas time. Everything in my being is telling me, "Don't go don't go" but then there's that tiny logical sense that kicks in and says, "you have to go."
I've actually had more peace today than I have all week. I guess I just realize that I cannot control the outcome anymore and have given up. I'm tired; exhausted. I realize that, although I make choices, whatever will be will be. If God ordains it, then it is good. So, whatever happens tomorrow will be good. I have a feeling this appointment is going to be a really positive experience. I don't know what will come of it or what we will be told but I just have a peace about it. However, if you see me at 9:59am tomorrow morning you might catch a girl with sweaty palms, a racing heart that feels like it is going to explode, and a stomach that is doing back flips. But I will be comforted in knowing that HE is in control!
Words cannot express how grateful I am to all of you for your calls, emails, kind thoughts, and most of all, prayers. I think I would've stayed in my pj's in bed all week if it wasn't for all of you. Seriously! I wish I could do something to repay what you have done for me, Scott, and Jackson. As I thank you with much gratitude I come to you humbly asking for prayer tomorrow morning. You'd think I'd want you to pray for the news that we can successfully have another baby. Although this is my dream, I desire to be smack-dab in the middle of the Lord's will regardless of what it is. So, my prayer request is that His will be known to us. That we may abide in Him and whatever He calls us to do. I ask that you pray for a great peace to wash over Scott and I as we enter the doctor's office. Pray that our thoughts are clear so that we may ask wise questions. Pray that His presence may be known and felt to both Scott and I. I desire to see Him tomorrow and truly feel I will. Your prayers humble me, while at the same time, empower me. Pray knowing and believing that He hears you and He is good!
"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phil. 4:6-7
I've actually had more peace today than I have all week. I guess I just realize that I cannot control the outcome anymore and have given up. I'm tired; exhausted. I realize that, although I make choices, whatever will be will be. If God ordains it, then it is good. So, whatever happens tomorrow will be good. I have a feeling this appointment is going to be a really positive experience. I don't know what will come of it or what we will be told but I just have a peace about it. However, if you see me at 9:59am tomorrow morning you might catch a girl with sweaty palms, a racing heart that feels like it is going to explode, and a stomach that is doing back flips. But I will be comforted in knowing that HE is in control!
Words cannot express how grateful I am to all of you for your calls, emails, kind thoughts, and most of all, prayers. I think I would've stayed in my pj's in bed all week if it wasn't for all of you. Seriously! I wish I could do something to repay what you have done for me, Scott, and Jackson. As I thank you with much gratitude I come to you humbly asking for prayer tomorrow morning. You'd think I'd want you to pray for the news that we can successfully have another baby. Although this is my dream, I desire to be smack-dab in the middle of the Lord's will regardless of what it is. So, my prayer request is that His will be known to us. That we may abide in Him and whatever He calls us to do. I ask that you pray for a great peace to wash over Scott and I as we enter the doctor's office. Pray that our thoughts are clear so that we may ask wise questions. Pray that His presence may be known and felt to both Scott and I. I desire to see Him tomorrow and truly feel I will. Your prayers humble me, while at the same time, empower me. Pray knowing and believing that He hears you and He is good!
"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phil. 4:6-7
Comments
If they tell you the worst case scenario that does not mean that God can not perform miracles. I have 2 boys with birth defects (Bi Lateral Cleft Lip and Palate), when I was pregnant both times I was told by the Geneticist that according to their standards I should abort (both times there tests were wrong)! If you want more details email me or leave a message on my blog with your email and I will share. I had many and still have opportunities to witness about My Saviour to the Geneticists.
I will be praying for peace for you and that you are able to handle whatever the news they have for you.