Starving

I woke up in the middle of the night...well, let's be honest, a child woke me up in the middle of the night and I could not go back to sleep. My mind started racing and thinking and making lists and doing all of the things it should not have been doing at 4am. What, in particular, was I thinking about? Groceries. Weird I know. My mind is a crazy place. I was thinking about the order of a grocery store (bear with me) and how they are so packed full of food and literally on almost every corner. I thought about all the preservatives they have to put in food to keep it "fresh" and all the research out there terrifying us with all the new "facts" about what we put into our bodies and how each bite of the stuff will lead to cancer and death. Good stuff, right?!?!? Doesn't everyone think this way when they can't sleep. Ha! This thinking about our abundance of food led me to thinking about our friends who are adopting a baby from Ethiopia. I thought about this orphan, the many orphans there, and their living conditions. There are no grocery stores. No preservatives. No abundance of food. Many are starving; malnourished. I started wondering, what if I were starving? What would I hold on to? Does all this excess in our society keep me from Him; from truly surrendering, loving, and serving Him? Yep. It sure does. I became envious of their lifestyle of sacrifice. Do I have any desire to starve or live in a country where poverty is the norm? Absolutely not. To be completely honest, I love my cushioned life. I do think, however, we can learn from these people and their lives filled with lack. What would you hold onto if you had nothing. What would you do if you lived their life? Would you, I, be so stripped of everything that distracts us that we grab onto God with such great desperation that we never EVER let go? I want that. I don't want to be distracted by too much food that's not good for me anyway. I don't want more shoes (yes, ladies, I said it) nor do I want more stuff. I want more of Him. I want to long, to starve for, God. To search for Him like I would food if I hadn't eaten in days; weeks. My desire is to be so completely filled by God that there is nothing else that I need to fulfill anything in me. His Word says that He is the bread of life. He nourishes our souls AND our physical bodies. He sustains us. I will continue to live in our world where more is better. However, my mindset will be forever changed. He is my fulfillment, my all, the essence of my being. I will live for Him and Him alone. Things will still entice me and I will want and splurge. I will eat too much and become too full. I am working, though, on being full on Him and Him alone. John 6:26-35 Jesus answered, "I tell you the truth, you are looking for me, not because you saw miraculous signs but because you ate the loaves and had your fill. Do not work for food that spoils, but for food that endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give you. On him God the Father has placed his seal of approval." Blessings, Megan To learn more about my friends, the Evans family, adoption go to http://evansadoptionjourney.blogspot.com