Has anyone ever said to you, "Let go and let God"? I've heard that phrase many times before and honestly thought that I have let go and let God. However, I don't think I ever really "let go." I always hold onto some part of what I am trying to let go. I am an inward hoarder; a control freak. I am a fighter. I want to do things my way, and, many times, only trust myself to do it correctly. How awful is that? I trust myself with my life more than the One who created me. Hmmmm...I've never really thought about that until I just typed that out. Well, it only took major tragedy for me to learn my lesson but last night I learned to let go.
I had a moment yesterday. I just broke down still reeling from everything. I think my emotions were hightened because today is my uncle's funeral. Whatever the case may be, I finally let go. I had to. I couldn't carry the weight of my burdens anymore. I was tired, weak, and hungry for something better for my life. No longer was I going to hold onto what God has told me He would gladly carry.
I am reading a book my sister sent me. I was apprehensive at first because I thought it to be the next popular self-help book blah, blah, blah. However, I was mistaken. This woman is searching; searching for answers on this journey of life. Searching for God. I, too, am searching. Thankfully, I have already found my God. But, I am searching for meaning in this season of my life asking God what I am supposed to learn from all this. One major epiphany I had was that I have to let go. In her book the author has an experience where she let's go. Someone gives her a piece of paper as she goes off by herself and line upon line the writer is telling her to let go. Let go. Let go. I have to let go. So, yesterday next to my bed hidden from the world, I let go. I had to.
I was comforted after this experience by a song by the David Crowder Band. The song goes as follows:
You never let go
Joy and Pain
Sun and rain
You never let go
See, the most comforting thing of all this is that He never let's go. No matter how much I question, or fight, or cry He doesn't let go of me. He holds on tight because He knows I am a fighter. All He wants me to do is let go. So, I did. I let go.
I had a moment yesterday. I just broke down still reeling from everything. I think my emotions were hightened because today is my uncle's funeral. Whatever the case may be, I finally let go. I had to. I couldn't carry the weight of my burdens anymore. I was tired, weak, and hungry for something better for my life. No longer was I going to hold onto what God has told me He would gladly carry.
I am reading a book my sister sent me. I was apprehensive at first because I thought it to be the next popular self-help book blah, blah, blah. However, I was mistaken. This woman is searching; searching for answers on this journey of life. Searching for God. I, too, am searching. Thankfully, I have already found my God. But, I am searching for meaning in this season of my life asking God what I am supposed to learn from all this. One major epiphany I had was that I have to let go. In her book the author has an experience where she let's go. Someone gives her a piece of paper as she goes off by herself and line upon line the writer is telling her to let go. Let go. Let go. I have to let go. So, yesterday next to my bed hidden from the world, I let go. I had to.
I was comforted after this experience by a song by the David Crowder Band. The song goes as follows:
You never let go
Joy and Pain
Sun and rain
You never let go
See, the most comforting thing of all this is that He never let's go. No matter how much I question, or fight, or cry He doesn't let go of me. He holds on tight because He knows I am a fighter. All He wants me to do is let go. So, I did. I let go.
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