The Fish Tank

I went into my youngest's room to pick up the floor and straighten the beds. Their fish, Goldie, started swimming around like a maniac. I assumed he hadn't been fed yet, so I obliged and gave him a few flakes committed to not allowing the fish to die on my watch. I made sure I followed the boys' instructions for fish care implicitly. They have them taped to the wall in case one may forget. Three flakes of food. That is all this little Beta needs. Three tiny little flakes. How depressing. The moment I drop the food in the tank, he grabs them. If he had teeth, he would bite my finger. Hungry little fella. A little food for a little fish. Isn't this true for our spiritual life? We take in a little bit of the Word only growing in small amounts. We have good reason why we aren't reading our Bibles very much. Our schedules are overloaded. The kids are little and interrupt us every time we try and pick it up. We are too tired before bed at night and cannot, no matter w

I sat outside in my chair to do some work on my computer while I watched the boys play. There's been some tension in our pack of boys and I wanted to make sure everything stayed even keel. I noticed one of the boys trying to pull another child away from a game; kind of trying to isolate that kiddo away from the one whom he was playing. Anyway, I went over to the little guy to chat. His first instinct: blame someone else. This didn't work out for him too well since the kid he chose to blame was not even there. When I confronted him on accepting that it was he who made the mistake, he completely shut down. It was torturous to admit fault and blame. Calling this boy out on his mistake was more than he could handle. Like many of us, we don't want to admit guilt. In our culture, we believe there is an innocent race; that we have innocent neighborhoods. This is the root of our problems with one another. You see, there are no innocent people or innocent neighborhoods. Not one.

Social media. I have a love/hate relationship with you. I love that you keep me connected with people: my family and friends from near and far currently and from the past. I love cheering on friends from the other side of the screen; excited for their victories and praying for their hardships. And then there are those that deflate me. If I am not careful, I will follow someone just to watch the train wreck. I may even follow just to be in "the know" of their life not really caring about them deeply. Sometimes I follow some just so I don't miss out on what they may post next. This is totally unhealthy, obviously. What is in your social media feeds? What are you seeing everyday? What is filling your heart and your mind? We like to scroll. Scrolling removes us from reality which may seem too hard, daunting, or hurtful in the moment. Scrolling turns our brains off from the busyness of the day. It's mindless. Or, is it? We are captivated by what's in that littl

"Son of man, these men have set up their idols in their hearts and have put right before their faces the stumbling block of their iniquity Should I be consulted by them at all?" Ezekiel 14:3 I like symbols. For the most part, they bring about good memories. I love a good pumpkin because it stirs in me the longing for cool crisp air, falling leaves, and the holiday season. Each year, my husband and I drag the boys out to the Christmas tree farm in honor of Clark Griswold and chop down our family Christmas tree. I also love to hang my flag outside my home proudly every chance I get. Symbols are useful tools. They evoke emotion and nostalgia. Sometimes symbols bring pain and hurt. The cross is an example of both. You cannot think of the cross without remembering pain. Nor, can you remember the cross and without experiencing such great hope. But, if I get too fixated on the cross, a symbol I hold so dear, I lose sight on the most important part of my faith story: Jesus. It'

One of the criminals who were hanged there was hurling abuse at Him, saying, “Are You not the Christ? Save Yourself and us!” But the other answered, and rebuking him said, “Do you not even fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed are suffering justly, for we are receiving what we deserve for our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.” And he was saying, “Jesus, remember me when You come in Your kingdom!” And He said to him, “Truly I say to you, today you shall be with Me in Paradise.” Luke 23:39-43 The thief on the cross. We like him. Well, most of us do. We like that he was a criminal yet, Jesus told him he would be with him in paradise. It comforts us to know that we, too, may make it to paradise one day even though we are a royal mess. I went out on a limb and listened to a podcast with a speaker who has gone a little rogue in the Christian faith. Honestly, I was going to skip over this one because I didn't want to hear her rhetoric

"Two are better off than one, because together they can work more effectively. If one of them falls down, the other can help him up. But if someone is alone and falls, it’s just too bad, because there is no one to help him." Ecclesiastes 4:9- "People learn from one another, just as iron sharpens iron." Proverbs 27:17 "And so encourage one another and help one another, just as you are now doing." 1 Thessalonians 5:11 Everybody needs a champion. We all need that one person in our corner cheering us on. You know the one: the friend that believes in you when you cannot believe in yourself. We all need a champion. The Bible gives us many examples of people championing for one another. A perfect example of this is Jonathan and David. You find their story in 1 and 2 Samuel in the Old Testament. Jonathan was David's biggest cheerleader. Instead of being his rival or being envious of David's future as king, Jonathan gave David his robe and milita

Ah, religion. It's pretty little walls hold us in tight with its rules and regulations. We like the safety of knowing; the list where we can check all the boxes. Religion all neat and tidy luring us in with its way of life that will lead to safety and good tidings. It feels safe in the arms of religion. There is no questioning or doubting what the rules are. We can easily get into the routine of religion. Be good. Be nice. Speak kindly. Don't sin. Dress up and go to church on Sunday. It's easy. Known. Comfortable. But... Jesus didn't live for safety. Jesus didn't play within the confines of the rules. Jesus was a risk taker. Jesus did not hang out in the safety of the four walls that religion provides. Jesus didn't walk with the religious elite. Jesus walked with the outcasts. Jesus challenged the religious elite. Jesus ran towards danger. Not away. Religion will keep you safe. Jesus will get you killed. 'Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him

"You are like that illuminating light . Let your light shine everywhere you go, that you may illumine creation , so men and women everywhere may see your good actions, may see creation at its fullest, may see your devotion to Me, and may turn and praise your Father in heaven because of it." Matthew 5:16 (emphasis mine) Knowing my mom would be in town and she loves yoga, my sister asked me if we wanted to attend a hurricane relief fundraiser at a yoga class. We would meet early Saturday morning (yawn) and do some yoga on the grass by the farmer's market. Well, that sounds amazing! Of course I responded with a big old YES looking forward to getting my stretch on all while having some good mother/daughter/sister bonding time. Only this wasn't you're ordinary yoga. This was Holy Yoga. I had heard about holy yoga from friends and have wanted to try it for some time now. I also heard how many people cried sometime during the experience. Grrrrreat. Since I am a HUGE

Sometimes it's just too hard. This whole mommin', dream chasing, goal making, identity finding life is hard. Things don't just happen. I wish they did. I wish we could be like Aladdin and have our three wishes granted with the rub of a lamp. Or maybe I don't. I'm not sure. What I do know is this whole life thing can feel weighty. The unknown scary. I know the verses. I can speak the Christianese. His yoke is easy. His burden is light. (Matthew 11:30). I will face trials but should remain joyful. (James 1:2) I shouldn't fear for He is with me. (Isaiah 41:10) I got the words. I know the Scripture. But life man, it can be hard. My boys were in and out of the house. Sweaty little faces coming back in for water and snacks rushing back out so they wouldn't miss a thing with their friends in the park. The house was quiet when they'd spill outside. My services not really needed or wanted in that moment. I gave up my life for them. My identity changed

Hear my heart. We all need connectedness. We need people. Real human beings face-to-face doing life with us. Facebook won't do it. Instagram won't suffice. Twitter cannot be our word count for the day. We need connection. Real life connection. It is said that we are the most connected now than ever. We can reach someone on a different continent within seconds. Yet, we find ourselves at a breaking point full of loneliness, depression, and despair. Why? How can we be more connected yet so disconnected? I can tell you why. Because we weren't designed to connect through a machine. We were built, created, designed to live life with one another. We need to hear, feel, smell, touch others. We were meant to disagree and be challenged by each other. We long to be loved by someone. It is in our DNA. Jesus didn't live in isolation. He lived just the opposite. He had his band of buddies, his inner crew that knew all and saw all, and he had his haters. He knew when it was time

I recently had a friend send me a link to an author's Facebook live. The topic was on dreams; the dreams we have and how to attain them. It's not a dream. It's a goal. BAM! Rachel Holis explained that dreams live in this far off unattainable land. Dreams are something you think about and wish could happen. In order to make dreams a reality, one must transition the verbiage from dream to goal. Whoa! This is SO simple but it was SO eye-opening for me. I can talk all day long about the dreams I have for myself and accomplish nothing but a high count of spoken word for the day. But, the moment I change my dream to a goal I now have something to work towards. I have talked about my dreams A LOT for the past three years. I talked about them with friends, my husband, and even wrote about them a time or two. It wasn't until the end of the summer that I finally transitioned my dreams to goals. And let me just tell you, that was kind of scary. I think we like to liv

Mondays are crazy. I call them manic Mondays and often sing the song in my head. It's the day where I try to get everything done. I don't know why I tackle the entire to-do list in one day when I have an entire week, but I do. I run here, there, and everywhere trying to get us back on track after the weekend. I was driving from the grocery store to the bank when I noticed everyone moving around like little ants. It reminded me how the world looks so small from up high in a plane everyone scurrying about. Ants are incredible workers. They carry loads beyond what seems logical and all work together in an orderly fashion to complete their goal. They are annoying, but incredible little creatures. As I saw the man walk into the UPS store as I drove by, saw the woman jogging down the path, and slowed because of traffic, I felt like we were all little ants dashing from here-to-there trying to accomplish all our tasks. If I am not careful, my manic Mondays can become just that: man

I noticed I hadn't spent much time with my middle guy. I was aching for some one-on-one time with him. I told him we needed a date and said a little prayer that God would enable me some extra time with my favorite red-head. We went to Back-to-School night and I signed up to be my youngest's room mom. He had begged me to be more present at school and I thought this was the best way to fulfill his request. A couple of weeks later, I received a phone call asking if instead of being my second grader's room mom, I would be the room mom for my third grader. No one had signed up to help in his class and they were stuck. This is the second time this exact scenario had happened. My poor youngest born. I agreed to the gig even though I knew my little guy was going to be disappointed. Honestly, I was a little bummed as well. I had already fulfilled my room mom duties for my oldest two. It was my baby's turn. Flash forward a day or two and I realized what had just happened. I p

How many times have you said, "I can't." I can't because... I don't have the time My kids keep me too busy I am not qualified I feel silly I am too insecure I don't have the courage Someone else can do it better than me Someone else is already doing it I have said, "I can't" far too many times for reasons that are, quite frankly, dumb. I am a good excuse maker. I can convince myself why I shouldn't do something in record time. I don't want to think of the opportunities I have missed because of my "I can'ts." "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." 1 Corinthians 16:13 'Jesus looked at them and said, "With man, this is impossible, but not with God; with God, all things are possible." Mark 10:27 "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Galatians 6:9 "For I know the plans I have for