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Sometimes

Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you and persecute you, and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of Me. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great; for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you. Matthew 5:10-12

Sometimes you have to do what is unpopular. God calls us to a life not of this world. He asks us to be happy living this way and reminds us that our reward is not here but in heaven. Sometimes, though, that's really hard.

Today marks me and Scott's 12 year wedding anniversary. We started dating 18 years ago (me-oh-my) when I was a mere 18 year old high school graduate and he a young 24 year old fresh out of the military. He was so cute (and still is). When we started dating, Scott was not a Christian. I had just graduated high school and was heavily involved in our youth program. I fell in love and honestly thought I could change the man. I remember going to church with my dad and heading to lunch after. On several occasions, I would cry to my dad knowing I should break-up with Scott. Our faith roads did not meet and this would cause major conflict in the future (think marriage and kids). I could not bring myself to break-up with my best friend so God did it for me. He had Scott break it off with me. I fought and fought God on this but He knew better. I should have made the difficult but right choice but just couldn't. While we were apart, God worked miraculously in Scott's life and he was saved. He did a work in me too! God saved Scott not me. I realized I can't save people. Only God does that. I can plant seeds but He does the saving. Thank goodness! Thankfully, God blessed both of us and brought us back together. And here we sit, married for 12 years. God is so good even when it seems so hard. I tell that story as a reminder to myself: sometimes God asks us to do the hard thing, the unpopular choice, in order to teach us blessing us in the end.

I have been pining over something for awhile and when I say awhile, I mean a few years. God has occasionally nudged me a certain way to do a certain thing over the past couple years and I have yet to cave even though I know it is what is right. Call it pride, I don't know. I go to my "iron sharpening iron" friends and my husband whom I respect and admire and they give me good valid reasons not to act on this prompting but I know deep down in my heart this is what God is calling me to do. He's not asking me to do anything major; just something that is right. There may be consequences. Nothing horrible or terrifying, just some possible discomfort for me. We are all human and we cannot control another's reaction.

I feel like God has moved in me over time to follow through on His call. I know that this is a stronghold in my life; something that is keeping Him from doing all that He wants in and through me. I pray and pray and pray over this very subject yet I haven't fully listened. If I had, I would have done what He has called me to do years ago. It takes a certain amount of courage to do the hard stuff God calls us to do. I think we feel like we have to garner that confidence ourselves instead of relying on His steadfastness in our lives. If He is calling us to it, He will provide all means necessary. I need to believe that. Well, not just believe it, but live it.

So, I have decided to finally follow through on that prompting I have been feeling for so long. I will get out of my comfortable little world I try to create for myself and do something that takes courage in faith to do. I am not looking for accolades or bravos. I just want to do what is right by my Savior. I want a smile to shine across His face as He watches one of His daughters do what He and I both know is right. You see, this action I must take has nothing to do with anyone else. It is between He and I. Obedience. Sometimes it's hard but it is always right in the end.

Love & Blessings,
Meg

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