Skip to main content

Baggage

I am going to talk to all the ladies about some baggage I've been carrying around. Guys deal with this stuff, too, it's just a little different. When I was younger there were three of us girls that were thick as thieves. As one can imagine, however, threes a crowd and one of us was left out from time to time. That someone was usually me. I was younger and tended to be a little bossy and annoying. As an adult, I can see why I was left out. However, it still hurt and I carry that insecurity to this day.

Have you ever wondered why people will drop everything, or so it seems, for certain friends but you get left in the dust? You show up to as much as you possibly can supporting your posse of gals yet when it comes to something for you all you hear are crickets? Just me? Well, every once in awhile I find myself in a funk and wonder what they've got that I am lacking? I assume something must be wrong with me otherwise I would receive the same caring, kind, loving, VIP treatment that she is getting. It's a dark place to go and definitely not what we were created for. Relationships weren't meant to be competitions. Yet, oftentimes that is exactly what we make them out to be. It's her against me. Or, she must have something I don't. Or, the worst one of them all, something must be wrong with me.

I try not to let myself stay in that place of baggage for too long. I remind myself that my life isn't measured by how many people are on my guest list. When I lay may head down at night, I am not fulfilled by the attention from others. My cup is filled by the one who sustains me: Jesus. He is the only RSVP I need.

Maneuvering through friendships is hard. We have all this junk from our past that taints our future relationships. We mix different personalities and lots of baggage together and all wind up a mess feeling alone not realizing that we are all struggling.

I am a relational girl. I love connecting with others, loving on them and doing life together. I realize that people will fail me. A lot. It's not necessarily their intention, it's just life. I cannot seek my satisfaction or life's worth in relationships. I will be disappointed every time if I do. My wholeness comes from an eternal God who has a future and a hope for me (Jeremiah 29:11). He has a plan that started before He knit me together in my mother's womb (Psalm 139:13). He is unchanging, the beginning and the end, and the Alpha and Omega (Revelation 22:13). His love never fails (Psalm 146:4). He will never forsake me (Hebrews 13:5).

So, the next time my relationships get murky and I start to feel like the odd ball, I will remember Who fulfills me. I will remember that only He can sustain me and will not fail me. I will still love and I will still try working towards healthy relationships in which we both encourage, build up, and give to one another. But, my feet will land on my Solid Rock.

Love & Blessings,
Meg

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Holy Holy

I can't stop singing, "Holy, holy, holy is the Lord Almighty." Scott and I went to the "big" ultrasound today where we tested to see if our baby had Down's, one of the Trisomy disorders, or any neural tube defects. I must admit the palms were a little sweaty and the heart was racing a bit. As surreal as this pregnancy is, I don't want anything to be wrong with this precious life inside of me. Well, holy is right. The Lord is not just good; He is awesome! Our little baby instantly began moving and grooving for us showing off fingers and toes and a great heart beat! Even though I am on my third, watching the miracle of life on that screen NEVER gets old! It truly blows my mind every time I get to see our precious angels developing inside of me! The scan came out wonderfully. We got all positives on all the scans the doctor (who was absolutely INCREDIBLE) could do. Now we just wait for some blood work to confirm that everything is okay with our little boy. ...

Our Miracle

"He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles that cannot be counted." Job 9:10 "You are the God who performs miracles; You will display Your power among the peoples." Psalm 77:14 Meet our miracle...and our secret. Yes, it is true. I am pregnant; about twelve weeks and a few days to be exact. We wanted to make sure this baby was healthy before announcing how great God has been to us! We have known about this precious little blessing for a little over two months and have eagerly awaited numerous sonogram and test results. We have witnessed God's mighty, yet gentle, hand every Tuesday for the past five weeks. This baby is a fighter. However, the road is not "clear" quite yet. We met with the pareanatoligist today to do a sonogram and blood test to determine if there are any chromosomal abnormalities; specifically Downs, and Trisomy 13 and 18. Although the sonogram looked great and the doctor said we were in the "safe zone," we are stil...

Grady's Story

Grady Steven Fish 7lbs. 3oz. 19 1/2inches April 25, 2009 4:45pm SURPRISE! Actually, I think absolute shock is more appropriate! This was me a week ago...happy at 36 weeks pregnant with not much happening. I thought for sure that I had at least 2 weeks left, if not four. I did, however, frantically run around town that day getting all the things I thought I needed to get just in case. Good thing I am a little neurotic and OCD because it paid off a few days later. I have had contractions on and off since I was 25 weeks pregnant or so. I never thought anything of them because they were so sporadic and fairly painless. Friday camearound and I noticed that I was having more contractions than usual. Grady was still moving about so I didn't worry much. Around 2:30pm that day I laid down because the contractions were coming on a little stronger and closer together. I called Scott to let him know and honestly, to see when he was coming home from work. Jackson was still napping and I wasn...