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Valuable

The boys recently asked my about my teaching past. They wanted to know what grades I taught and what I thought of the kids. They asked if it was hard and if I liked to teach. Jack asked me if I wanted to teach again and I told him I wasn't sure. I let him know I was still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. He thought that was funny since I am already grown...obviously.

The next day I felt blah. Nothing happened to dampen my mood. I just was. I was feeling lonely, inadequate, and useless. No one said anything to make me feel this way. It was just one of those moments. I am merely a stay-at-home mom who folds laundry and packs lunches. Am I really contributing to this world? I know raising my boys is the most important thing I will ever do, but I wondered if there is more for me. Is there something waiting for me that I am missing? Am I valuable?

I realized that I find value in doing. My value, in my mind, is linked to what I do. As much as I don't want to admit it, I find my worth in the things I do or accomplish. I know this is backwards and not right. I know it in my mind. I just have to get that knowledge to my heart. For so long my worth and value came from my degrees, my career, and then my kids. Now, I stay home making dinner and playing chauffeur. Is that enough? Am I doing enough?

I am not more valuable in the busy. A career doesn't give me value. Popularity or the amount of friends I have doesn't give me value. My worth doesn't come in the form of perfectly folded laundry and freshly made meals on the dinner table. Nor, in a paycheck. My value comes from God. And it's about time I start believing what I know to be true.

"Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows." Luke 12:6-7

If God knows all the hairs on my head, I most certainly must be of value in His sight. Last year my motto was, "present over perfect." This year I am holding to "confidence in Christ." I am challenging myself to believe the truth and power in this statement. My value doesn't come from the things this world values. It comes from Him.

Love & Blessings,
Meg

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