I'm a fixer. Well, if I am being honest, I try to be a fixer but what ends up happening is that I need rescuing because my fixing has created a much larger problem. I like righting wrongs. Let me clarify. I like righting other people's wrongs. I am a rule-follower and rule-followers don't make a lot of mistakes. At least we like to believe we don't make a lot of mistakes.
Marriage is a beautifully messy conundrum. Two individuals come together from varying backgrounds uniting as one. There is no play book. We receive tons and tons of advice and opinions when we are engaged and newly married, but, like most things, everyone is different. We are usually so love-struck when we get married that we don't realize the road ahead can get a little rocky and curved.
Oftentimes, we enter marriage believing we can change our other half ridding them of those quirks and habits that we don't particularly like. We prod and nag hoping to see change to no avail. Instead, we create friction and usually give up on the issue. We try to fix our significant other when, all the while, we should have looked internally.
Our spouse is going to wrong us. Our partner is going to frustrate us. The love of our life may betray us. It is not our job to fix them. The only person who can fix them is Jesus. It is, however, our job to fix ourselves.
Let me explain. Relinquishing the need to fix your spouse releases you from the responsibility of their end result. It also gives you the opportunity to look inwardly at things that need fine tuning within. God isn't worried with how you fixed others. He's concerned with how you loved others. One way you can love your spouse is by letting go of the need to fix.
Once I handed over the responsibility to fix my spouse to God, I felt free to love him even more right in that very moment just as he is. I realized God designed my husband exactly as he is in order to merge with me making us one in Him. This doesn't mean there isn't room for improvement on either side or that one does not take responsibility for sin. It does, however, increase the love flow from me to him. I no longer have to spend time and energy on his faults. I can now focus on my soulmate.
I have enough fixin' of my own to do. When I feel the need to fix, whether it be my husband or a friend, I will look internally and ask God to reveal to me the areas where I need a little maintenance and I will resign from the fix-it master. I always make a mess of things anyway.
"Instead, be kind and tender-hearted to one another, and forgive one another, as God has forgiven you through Christ." Ephesians 4:32
"Above everything, love one another earnestly, because love covers over many sins." 1Peter 4:8
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Marriage is a beautifully messy conundrum. Two individuals come together from varying backgrounds uniting as one. There is no play book. We receive tons and tons of advice and opinions when we are engaged and newly married, but, like most things, everyone is different. We are usually so love-struck when we get married that we don't realize the road ahead can get a little rocky and curved.
Oftentimes, we enter marriage believing we can change our other half ridding them of those quirks and habits that we don't particularly like. We prod and nag hoping to see change to no avail. Instead, we create friction and usually give up on the issue. We try to fix our significant other when, all the while, we should have looked internally.
Our spouse is going to wrong us. Our partner is going to frustrate us. The love of our life may betray us. It is not our job to fix them. The only person who can fix them is Jesus. It is, however, our job to fix ourselves.
Let me explain. Relinquishing the need to fix your spouse releases you from the responsibility of their end result. It also gives you the opportunity to look inwardly at things that need fine tuning within. God isn't worried with how you fixed others. He's concerned with how you loved others. One way you can love your spouse is by letting go of the need to fix.
Once I handed over the responsibility to fix my spouse to God, I felt free to love him even more right in that very moment just as he is. I realized God designed my husband exactly as he is in order to merge with me making us one in Him. This doesn't mean there isn't room for improvement on either side or that one does not take responsibility for sin. It does, however, increase the love flow from me to him. I no longer have to spend time and energy on his faults. I can now focus on my soulmate.
I have enough fixin' of my own to do. When I feel the need to fix, whether it be my husband or a friend, I will look internally and ask God to reveal to me the areas where I need a little maintenance and I will resign from the fix-it master. I always make a mess of things anyway.
"Instead, be kind and tender-hearted to one another, and forgive one another, as God has forgiven you through Christ." Ephesians 4:32
"Above everything, love one another earnestly, because love covers over many sins." 1Peter 4:8
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Comments