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Balance

I didn't go today. I was in the car headed in that direction but didn't go. I turned left instead of going straight. After the week I had, I need a few minutes to breath and catch up on stuff before school let out and the boys got home. I decided not to go to the Fun Run at school and that was tough.

We try so hard to find balance. We like this word. Something about finding balance makes us feel like super heroes. We will exhaust ourselves with lists and organization in order to find balance. What if I told you that balance is unattainable. Balance isn't something we can find in our life.

Think about it. Some days we feel like we have crossed everything off the to-do list and accomplished everything we set our minds to the moment our feet hit the ground in the morning. But, what we don't realize is in completing the tasks, we've said no to other stuff. We had to say no to some things in order to be successful at the other things.

Balance is an unnecessary nuance. We chase this dream never to find relief.

I had big plans for myself as summer came to a close and the boys were getting ready to go back to school. I was going to get to do all the things I had to put aside because the kids were home each day. I like my organized little routine. But then, life swept in real quick and robbed me of that. I think my biggest frustration didn't lie in the reality that I wouldn't be able to get done what I wanted and needed to get done, but that I thought I was going to get back into this predictable routine and instead, life became chaos.

Finding balance ushers in predictability. Balance gives us this false sense of security that we are in control and know what is coming next. I think that is why we fight so hard to find balance in our lives. Once we forfeit balance in our lives, we feel like the rug is swept up from under us and that is scary.

I found freedom when I realized that life isn't about finding balance. Life is about letting the tide come in and out trusting that God has a perfect design to what seems chaotic. Sometimes, I will get to have my perfect schedule and my perfect day where everything on my list gets crossed off (this is heaven for me, y'all). And some days, I get to the gym and immediately have to turn the car around to pick up a sick kid throwing me off completely.

When we stop chasing balance and start chasing life, we start living. We are each unique and know what we need to sustain ourselves. Those are our priorities. We also give way to happenstance and the unexpected because it will come and mess with that tidy to-do list.

God's Word is very clear about balance. There is a time for everything. When things become chaotic and we become panicky because our scales are tipped, we need to rest that our life is moving perfectly even though we've lost our stability. When, in actuality, we've been stable all along because He is the one holding us.

Stop spinning the wheel to find balance. Rest in knowing there is a time for everything. I had to say no to being at my boys' school supporting them in one of their activities. That was difficult for me. I pride myself on being there for them. But, this life isn't about me and they will not grow up and talk about that one time mom didn't show up. Balance. I couldn't balance it all today and that's okay. The scales were tipped a little more in my personal direction and tomorrow they may tip a little more to my boys. And that's okay. I can rest in that.

"There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven-- A time to give birth and a time to die; A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted. A time to kill and a time to heal; A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to weep and a time to laugh; A time to mourn and a time to dance. A time to throw stones and a time to gather stones; A time to embrace and a time to shun embracing. A time to search and a time to give up as lost; A time to keep and a time to throw away. A time to tear apart and a time to sew together; A time to be silent and a time to speak. A time to love and a time to hate; A time for war and a time for peace." Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

Love & Blessings,
Meg

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