Let's talk Jen Hatmaker, shall we? If you have never heard of Hatmaker, she is a Christian author and speaker. She gained notoriety through some blog posts that went viral way back when. She is a good mix of funny and spiritual relating to the masses; especially moms. I started following her on social media years ago, have read some of her books, and seen her speak a few times. I enjoyed her style of humor, Bible, and approachable spirit.
Earlier this year, Hatmaker was under fire for an interview she did in which she changed her stance on marriage. She no longer held to the conviction that marriage should be between a man and a woman and came out in support of gay marriage. The Christian community lost their minds over this completely throwing Hatmaker under the bus and slamming on the gas pedal. It was bad. Really bad. Recently, she was scrutinized again for a Good Friday post she wrote on social media. The Christians once again went nuts over the fact that she compared her suffering to that of Christ's. It got ugly again.
I had numerous people message me and text me asking my opinion when she was first penalized for her change of position. I, like many, was a little shocked when I first read the article considering she had been quite staunch on staying true to her initial opinion of marriage. I read her article and a few that supported and opposed her. I read some of the supportive comments and nasty ones. I also read her husband's response to it all. It saddened me on so many levels. But, what saddened me the most was the reaction from the Christian community.
Let me state this clearly, this blog post is not in support of her changed stance on marriage. Nor, is it a place where I will chastise the Hatmakers or the Christians who slammed them. The focus of this blog entry is to talk about what we should do, what I do, when we are faced with these types of issues.
The outcry of the Christian public against Jen shouted much louder than her changed stance. The ugliest reverberated the walls of the internet into the homes of thousands. Conservatives, for the most part, were spewing hate-filled comments instead of respectful opposing dialog. Let's start here. While I do believe we should stand firm in our convictions and what we believe to be true, how we radiate these convictions to the world matters. There is a way to respectfully disagree with someone without stoning them to death in the public square. One thing that I hear repeatedly from non-church goers as I journey on this road of faith, is how hateful and hypocritical Christians can be. And you know what? I completely agree.
The moment a Christian or unbeliever steps outside the boundaries we have made culturally and through our bias, we attack. Instead of coming alongside our fellow sister in Christ, we throw daggers hoping to hit to destroy. For the most part, I think Christians' intentions are good. I believe those who spoke against Hatmakers changed outlook on marriage thought they were doing the right thing by standing against her. I also feel that many believers think it is their duty to speak out to help change the person and get them right with God. And this is where we fail.
It is not our responsibility, duty, or obligation to reconcile someone back to God. Let me say that again: it is not our responsibility, duty, or obligation to reconcile someone back to God.
Reconciliation for Jen Hatmaker, and anyone else for that matter, is between she and the Lord. Period.
When we take matters into our own hands "forcing" someone to reconcile with God, we are trying to play God removing our belief in the power of the Holy Spirit.
What do we do then? Well, I do believe we can speak our disagreement. However, it matters greatly how we present our argument. We don't live fearful of our disagreement. We don't chastise. We don't slander. We don't throw stones. If we are asked, we point to Scripture for that is where truth lies. We don't find the verse that best fits our argument. We develop our argument out of the Scriptures, all of the Scriptures, AND the context. We often remove context and surrounding verses in order to fit our needs making it our opinion not the truth of God. We gain freedom leaving the reconciling to God.
Then, we walk alongside our sister in Christ. We let her (or him) wrestle with God and his Word just as Jacob did in the Old Testament. That wrestling usually leads to good places. Believe that God will meet her in that space. Don't fear that a fellow believers questioning is going to lead people to hell. This whole fiasco led me to search the Scriptures even deeper. When I read Brandon Hatmaker's argument on their changed opinion, I didn't have a good rebuttal. So, I searched the Word, commentaries, and history to find my own stance. And you know what? It didn't lead me to a dark place. My faith was strengthened through my searching. Imagine that.
We also need to understand salvation. For some reason, us Christians have a list of requirements one must hold in order for our salvation to remain safe. If you veer off that list, you are damned to hell. Search yourself. Search your heart and see if you have a list. Hatmaker fell off that list as if she fell off a ledge into the Grand Canyon. Her new view on marriage voided her salvation in so many people's eyes. So, if I am looking into this Christian world from the outside and see this situation play out, I see that I have to understand the entirety of the Bible, understand every word and verse, and believe every bit of it to be saved. That's a tall order. Look, I will never fully understand the Word of God. I will die still holding onto so many unanswered questions. Does that negate my salvation? Absolutely not. I believe God sent his only Son, Jesus, to atone for my sins. I believe with all my heart he was raised on the third day to fulfill a prophecy and purpose so I may spend eternity with him. He doesn't call me to understand every ounce of the Scriptures before I can enter the pearly gates. He just calls me to believe.
We have got to stop trying to reconcile people to God. It is not our job to save them. It is, however, our job to love them. If Jen Hatmaker and her family came to Hope Fellowship church, I would save her a seat. If she wanted to tell me about her stance on marriage, I would invite the conversation listening more than talking so that I may understand her better. I would pray and allow the Holy Spirit to move in her in a powerful way. She is not a lost cause. If she is, than I am, too, and I don't like that calling on my life.
We need to love more. We need to trust God more. And we need to stop casting the first stone.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Earlier this year, Hatmaker was under fire for an interview she did in which she changed her stance on marriage. She no longer held to the conviction that marriage should be between a man and a woman and came out in support of gay marriage. The Christian community lost their minds over this completely throwing Hatmaker under the bus and slamming on the gas pedal. It was bad. Really bad. Recently, she was scrutinized again for a Good Friday post she wrote on social media. The Christians once again went nuts over the fact that she compared her suffering to that of Christ's. It got ugly again.
I had numerous people message me and text me asking my opinion when she was first penalized for her change of position. I, like many, was a little shocked when I first read the article considering she had been quite staunch on staying true to her initial opinion of marriage. I read her article and a few that supported and opposed her. I read some of the supportive comments and nasty ones. I also read her husband's response to it all. It saddened me on so many levels. But, what saddened me the most was the reaction from the Christian community.
Let me state this clearly, this blog post is not in support of her changed stance on marriage. Nor, is it a place where I will chastise the Hatmakers or the Christians who slammed them. The focus of this blog entry is to talk about what we should do, what I do, when we are faced with these types of issues.
The outcry of the Christian public against Jen shouted much louder than her changed stance. The ugliest reverberated the walls of the internet into the homes of thousands. Conservatives, for the most part, were spewing hate-filled comments instead of respectful opposing dialog. Let's start here. While I do believe we should stand firm in our convictions and what we believe to be true, how we radiate these convictions to the world matters. There is a way to respectfully disagree with someone without stoning them to death in the public square. One thing that I hear repeatedly from non-church goers as I journey on this road of faith, is how hateful and hypocritical Christians can be. And you know what? I completely agree.
The moment a Christian or unbeliever steps outside the boundaries we have made culturally and through our bias, we attack. Instead of coming alongside our fellow sister in Christ, we throw daggers hoping to hit to destroy. For the most part, I think Christians' intentions are good. I believe those who spoke against Hatmakers changed outlook on marriage thought they were doing the right thing by standing against her. I also feel that many believers think it is their duty to speak out to help change the person and get them right with God. And this is where we fail.
It is not our responsibility, duty, or obligation to reconcile someone back to God. Let me say that again: it is not our responsibility, duty, or obligation to reconcile someone back to God.
Reconciliation for Jen Hatmaker, and anyone else for that matter, is between she and the Lord. Period.
When we take matters into our own hands "forcing" someone to reconcile with God, we are trying to play God removing our belief in the power of the Holy Spirit.
What do we do then? Well, I do believe we can speak our disagreement. However, it matters greatly how we present our argument. We don't live fearful of our disagreement. We don't chastise. We don't slander. We don't throw stones. If we are asked, we point to Scripture for that is where truth lies. We don't find the verse that best fits our argument. We develop our argument out of the Scriptures, all of the Scriptures, AND the context. We often remove context and surrounding verses in order to fit our needs making it our opinion not the truth of God. We gain freedom leaving the reconciling to God.
Then, we walk alongside our sister in Christ. We let her (or him) wrestle with God and his Word just as Jacob did in the Old Testament. That wrestling usually leads to good places. Believe that God will meet her in that space. Don't fear that a fellow believers questioning is going to lead people to hell. This whole fiasco led me to search the Scriptures even deeper. When I read Brandon Hatmaker's argument on their changed opinion, I didn't have a good rebuttal. So, I searched the Word, commentaries, and history to find my own stance. And you know what? It didn't lead me to a dark place. My faith was strengthened through my searching. Imagine that.
We also need to understand salvation. For some reason, us Christians have a list of requirements one must hold in order for our salvation to remain safe. If you veer off that list, you are damned to hell. Search yourself. Search your heart and see if you have a list. Hatmaker fell off that list as if she fell off a ledge into the Grand Canyon. Her new view on marriage voided her salvation in so many people's eyes. So, if I am looking into this Christian world from the outside and see this situation play out, I see that I have to understand the entirety of the Bible, understand every word and verse, and believe every bit of it to be saved. That's a tall order. Look, I will never fully understand the Word of God. I will die still holding onto so many unanswered questions. Does that negate my salvation? Absolutely not. I believe God sent his only Son, Jesus, to atone for my sins. I believe with all my heart he was raised on the third day to fulfill a prophecy and purpose so I may spend eternity with him. He doesn't call me to understand every ounce of the Scriptures before I can enter the pearly gates. He just calls me to believe.
We have got to stop trying to reconcile people to God. It is not our job to save them. It is, however, our job to love them. If Jen Hatmaker and her family came to Hope Fellowship church, I would save her a seat. If she wanted to tell me about her stance on marriage, I would invite the conversation listening more than talking so that I may understand her better. I would pray and allow the Holy Spirit to move in her in a powerful way. She is not a lost cause. If she is, than I am, too, and I don't like that calling on my life.
We need to love more. We need to trust God more. And we need to stop casting the first stone.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
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