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Holy

"You are like that illuminating light. Let your light shine everywhere you go, that you may illumine creation, so men and women everywhere may see your good actions, may see creation at its fullest, may see your devotion to Me, and may turn and praise your Father in heaven because of it." Matthew 5:16 (emphasis mine)

Knowing my mom would be in town and she loves yoga, my sister asked me if we wanted to attend a hurricane relief fundraiser at a yoga class. We would meet early Saturday morning (yawn) and do some yoga on the grass by the farmer's market. Well, that sounds amazing! Of course I responded with a big old YES looking forward to getting my stretch on all while having some good mother/daughter/sister bonding time. Only this wasn't you're ordinary yoga. This was Holy Yoga.

I had heard about holy yoga from friends and have wanted to try it for some time now. I also heard how many people cried sometime during the experience. Grrrrreat. Since I am a HUGE baby and cry at the sight of my children singing off-key at their music recitals at school, I knew I was in for it.

As we began the class, the instructor read Matthew 5:16 to us. She spoke of the sunrise and talked about being the light. Phew. No tears yet. This was easy peasy. Then came the stretching.

I had worked out hard that week. I pushed myself and my muscles to the limit. So, when we were asked to do child's pose, I grimaced in pain. My muscles, specifically my quads, were SO tight. I could barely bend over my legs to get into the pose. It hurt. As we "rested" (I add quotes around rested because I was not resting. I was tensing up to relieve the pain.), the instructor read Matthew 5:16 over us once again. This time, she honed in on surrendering and letting go. She wanted us to release the tension.

Ugh. Releasing my muscles to sink deeper into child't pose HURT. All I wanted to do was keep the tension in my legs so I wouldn't feel the pain of letting go. It hurt too bad to let go.

Let go.

Surrender.

Illumine creation by letting go.

You know what hurts? Surrender. You know what makes us grimace? Letting go. But, I cannot "illumine creation" until I surrender. I cannot reflect His light in me until I let go.

Ouch.

I hold so tightly to so much in my life. I am white knuckling most things most of the time all because in my mind, holding on tightly, restricting my grip, feels better to me than letting it go. I feel like I have control. I feel protected. Safe. The tighter I grip, the less pain I feel.

As I sat there in child's pose I could not hold on any longer. I had to let go. I had to let my muscles unravel and fall into the pose. Guess what? The moment I released the tension was the moment I felt relief. My muscles were able to unwind and let go and so was I. In that moment I felt surrender not just in the physical sense, but the spiritual. Once I let go of that tight grip, I felt His light penetrate my soul.

We like to hold on. It feels better to grip tightly. Letting go, surrender, is scary and, quite frankly, hurts sometimes. But, I cannot shine until I fully let go; surrender.

How can I be a light when I am tense? Holding on with all I've got dims His light in me. The tighter the grip, the darker I get. My soul retreats within itself no longer shining that bright light for all to see.

My goal in this life is to illumine creation; to reflect His light in me so brightly that the only thing people around me can do is praise Him. I can't achieve this if my knuckles are clenched tight.

Every day I am called to surrender. Where I focus my time, where my energy lies, what I fix my eyes, mind, and eyes on matter. What am I holding so tightly to that I cannot release the tension?

I didn't cry during holy yoga but I wanted to. What I did do, however, was learn to surrender. I learned that releasing the tension in order to sink deeper into the pose while painful in the moment, feels good on the other side.

What do you need to surrender today? What are you holding onto so tightly that your knuckles are white? What is dimming your light today?

Let it go.

Surrender.

Illumine creation by letting go.

"You are like that illuminating light. Let your light shine everywhere you go, that you may illumine creation, so men and women everywhere may see your good actions, may see creation at its fullest, may see your devotion to Me, and may turn and praise your Father in heaven because of it." Matthew 5:16 (emphasis mine)

Love & Blessings,
Meg

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