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Lay It Down

Of course I am learning something through this trial. I would be lying if I said I wasn't or if I told you that I wasn't being challenged in some way. One of my very dear friends has been telling me to read this book for some time now. I was very hesitant at first because I knew what it would entail and I don't think I was ready. The title of the book is, "When I Lay My Isaac Down." Now do you understand my hesitation? I am not ready to give up control. God asked Abraham to remain faithful and sacrifice his son, Isaac. I could not do that! Are you crazy?! Abraham's unmovable faith astounds and baffles me! But, God says we can have that kind of faith. He actually desires it of us!

What I am learning is that no matter what God asks me to "lay down" He promises to be there. He promises so much more for me through my faithfulness. He has also been teaching me that what I think I am actually grasping onto; controlling is not really there. I don't have any control over the situation so what the heck am I holding onto? Thin air I guess.

I was reading this book turning the page frantically as I road the elliptical at the gym last night. I couldn't get through each page fast enough. I was sad when my hour was up (thanks to my reading my exercise went fast!). I wanted to drop to my knees then and there and lay my Isaac down; my burden and worries about another baby, miscarriage, blah, blah, blah. I didn't drop to my knees at the gym out of fear that they would commit the crazy blond lady but I did pray fervently that I can give up this control that I think I have over the situation and have faith in a mighty God who so desires to do great things for me but I am restricting Him because of my hold on my "Isaac."

I asked myself: Has He ever failed me? Has he ever left me? What have the results been after trials in my life? Every answer was positive. He has never left, never failed, and always followed through with tremendous blessings after a storm. So what the heck is my problem? It's called faith and faith ain't easy! If it was, everybody would have it.

I have to share some stuff from the book because the author illustrates this concept far more brilliantly than I ever could. She talks about how we all experience some type of "unthinkable circumstance" in our lives. It doesn't matter what our circumstance is, what matters, she says, is how we respond to that circumstance. I love what she says: "Will you curl up in that alluring fetal position or will you struggle on to find God, hope, purpose, and passion amid your circumstance?" Oh how I love that fetal position. I have been there many a time on the floor of my closet. It just feels so good but not at all powerful. Oh how much better it felt to stand, be strong, and face this battle finding God, hope, purpose, and passion. I gave meaning to what seemed to be a meaningless circumstance.

Okay, so now I have to share this because it was SO convicting. The author writes. "Abraham trusted in God's faithfulness so completely that he was willing to surrender what he deeply loved without being able to envision a specific or positive outcome. In an act of strong faith and total trust in God, Abraham made the decision to lay his Isaac down." Ugh! That tugged on my heart! Holy cow! God asked this father to sacrifice his son and he was going to follow through because he had faith in how GREAT his God is without even knowing what the ending would entail!!!! AMAZING!!! God asks us to lay our Isaac's down not to punish us but to show us His great love for us; His faithfulness that He will follow through on our faith by showing Himself in such a mighty way like He did for Abraham. He provided a ram to be sacrificed, saved Isaac, and made Abraham's descendants greater than the number of the stars all because Abraham made the choice to lay down his Isaac and be faithful to His God. Oh how I desire this great faith!!!

I know this is a long post and I could go on. I have so many pages dog-eared and I am only on page 63 out 189. What I am learning is that it is far greater to lay my Isaac down than to try to hold onto control of something I have absolutely no control over. One last thought before I end this long post...Jesus said to Martha after Lazarus passed away "Didn't I tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?" I long to see His glory and I know I will. Although I have moments when I have to lay it down every minute or every five minutes, I feel set free! I have decided to take the leap of faith and "lay my Isaac down."

The book is called "When I Lay My Isaac Down" by Carol Kent

Comments

Shannon said…
You are an amazing woman of faith! Thank you for being so open and honest because you are an encouragement to me! Love you guys!
Carly Peters said…
Megan, God is using your circumstance to be a blessing to so many of us. We all need to learn that lesson. Thank you for allowing God to use you in your difficult time. You are an awesome lady! Love you!!!
Michelle said…
Your posts are always so inspiring. I enjoy reading your blog. Send me an email with your email so I can add you to my blog list. michellepeden@sbcglobal.net
Whitney said…
"Live your life such that those who do not know Jesus will come to know Jesus because they know you."
I heard this quote last week at church and immediately thought of you, Megan. Your faith is an inspiration to all of us and your words are so empowering.
Love you,
Whitney

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