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Monday Musings~In His Hands

"Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?' And I said, 'Here I am. Send me."
Isaiah 6:8

Does everyone struggle with giving up control or is it just me? I think in my little mind that I have full control over my life's journey; where I am going to go, what I am going to do, how my kids are going to be, etc, etc. Little do I know that I have absolutely no control. Yes, I can make choices to go this way or that, but ultimately God is the author of this life.

Recently, Jackson has been singing, "He's Got the Whole World in His Hands," Uncanny timing for me to hear this priceless Sunday School song. I have been questioning, and pondering, and questioning some more. I am wondering what to do when I grow up. I have been a student, a teacher, a mommy, a wife...but what do I want to do now; in this season? I had a few ideas and some options but just wasn't satisfied. I am a go-getter. I have to be challenged and busy all the time or I just feel lopsided. So, I called my "separated-at-birth-friend" when it comes to this stuff, Brandi, and she steered me in the right direction. I sent out my emails and made my phone calls. Then came the hard part; I waited.

Four days passed and I began to get discouraged. Then I got an unexpected suggestion. One I had pushed aside for months. I quickly realized that I could push this under the rug no longer and pursued it. After that, a flood of emails and calls came in. Some were clearly, "No, you are not doing this right now." While others were, "check it out and see what you think."

My point in all this is that God has a plan for our lives; a perfect plan. And sometimes, many times in my case, we get in His way. I was home today with my sweet angel boys. I am never just home with them. I am always running here or there or if I am home and I am doing a million things. Even though I tried my hardest to do the million things I thought I had to get done in order to feel productive, I realized that this is where God wants me to be in this season. He keeps trying to tell me that this season, the season of raising my precious angels, is going to pass by me very quickly and I am going to look back and wish with all my heart that I could steal these moments back from my memory.

So, instead of trying to control my life and where I am going, I am going to sit back and let Him take the steering wheel for awhile. I think I like the scenery here looking out my window at the man He created for me and my two angelic boys. I'm in good hands.
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Comments

Casey said…
My dear Miss Megan, you do not always need to be "productive". Relax a little, lady. The more I tried to do, the more my little troopers rebelled! No fun for a control freak.
August 24, 2009 at 6:10 PM
Anonymous said…
Wait, what did you decide to do ultimately?? Unexpected suggestion?
August 25, 2009 at 7:42 AM
Becca said…
You have some of the most inspirational posts. I love to read them. SO many of them speak directly to me and I know that God is speaking through you. I struggle with letting God take control too.
August 27, 2009 at 10:49 AM
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