The Fish Tank

Okay. So my junk drawer isn't that bad. I can't help it. I live better when things are tidy and in their place. It seems I have miraculously become nine months pregnant because I am a nesting and organizing crazy lady over here ever since the boys went back to school. But, let's face it, we all have our junk. "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective." James 5:16 I think one of the most difficult things in life is owning our junk. Seriously. Who wants to fess up to the crud in their life? I am not raising my hand. One of our sons made a mistake the other day. He was not happy to talk about said issue and was a hot mess, to say the least. One thing my husband and I kept saying over and over to him was to own it and move on. Doesn't it seem that life is so much easier when we own our junk, learn from it, and move on. If we don't, we find ourse...

I decided to take a leap: a BIG leap. As I am maneuvering through the waters of this new adventure, I started asking myself why. Why am I putting myself out there like this? Why am I living my comfort zone? Why am I taking awkward videos of myself for all the world to see? Why? Because I want to create community. Life is a journey: a messy road where faith and life intersect. I want to create space for that mess. I want you to leave your dirty laundry on the floor and possibly step on some Legos. "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." 1 Thessalonians 5:11 My desire is to build a community where people can come together and be real, vulnerable, and raw without be judged or condemned. I want people to feel safe when they have questions about their faith because let's face it, this whole God thing can be hard and if you claim it's all sunshine and rainbows, you are a big fat liar. Here's what I am learning....

"You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love." Galatians 5:13 Trauma reveals a lot about a person. When catastrophe strikes, we see the good and the bad of humanity. We all react in various ways to varying degrees. I keep watching the coverage of the catastrophe in my home state waiting to hear the negative news report. You know the one: someone did something wrong and now this whole event is all their fault or some kind of similar rhetoric. I don't do this because I pine for opposition. Rather, I have been conditioned in a way. We all have. A disaster strikes and we wait for the horrendous news where we all hang our heads. I am not seeing that though. Instead, I am witnessing an outage of flat bottom boats because people are buying them so fast all in an effort to help their fellow man. When my oldest was about to enter kindergarten, a new buzz word came on the scene....

About a year ago, a popular writer, blogger, and speaker came under fire. She hit a wall of atrocities and did it in the public eye. She faced a ton of scrutiny and, like most of us would, shrunk back into her safe zone finding sanctity in her pack. What I have noticed since, is a shift from the uncomfortable into the more comfortable spaces for this author. She's gravitated towards like-minded thinkers which, if we are being honest with ourselves, we all do. In this process, she has spoken out about breaking free from her branding. However, what I have noticed is that while she is freeing herself from one type of branding, she's unknowingly (or maybe consciously) moved into another branding. As much as she's wanted to completely unchain herself from the market of branding, she has done what seems to be the opposite and just re-branded herself. All the while, she's shifted those she surrounds herself with to fit the mold of the new brand. As I watch this woman ebb a...

Do you know what's easy? Making my boys' beds. Well, maybe not the one who has a red tint to his hair. I don't know what he does when he sleeps but it looks like someone wrapped him up in all his blankets and lovies and then they exploded. What's easy for me is knowing I am going to wake-up at 6am tomorrow. I will change into workout clothes and then begin to open the blinds and curtains around the front of the house. I will meander into the kitchen and turn the coffee pot on. I will then open the roman shades in the kitchen and feed the dog. After that, I will grab backpacks from the boys' lockers in the garage and work my way to making breakfast. After that's all started, I will head upstairs (not after turning on the lamp on my way up) and open the door to my two littlest cherubs. I will kiss their warm squishy cheeks and sing a little ditty. I will then head downstairs and get breakfast out on the bartop. I will pull lunches and water bottles from the fridge...

There's something happening. Do you feel it? Our world is shifting. Everything we thought we knew: questioned. People are pushing against accepted social norms with a vengeance. I kind of like it. When all the election mess began over a year ago, I kept saying, "Watch the Church. Keep your eyes on the church in the next five years." I am talking about the collective Church, not your personal church you attend on Sunday morning. I am speaking to the Church as a whole. There is a rising; a stirring. Church was packed on Sunday. Wall-to-wall people and that was one of five services on one of three of our campuses. Now, I need to mention that our church always sees an uptick in attendance the Sunday before school begins. However, this felt different. There was a hunger for something unseen; something more than this world has to offer. Us church-folk are freaking out. We hear something that goes against the traditions and values of the Church and we lose our minds and th...

About three years ago, I latched onto a phrase with a vengeance. I wrote it on a chalkboard I kept in my office, scribbled it on a 3x5 card and kept it in my Bible. I wrote about it and talked about it all the time. "Confidence in Christ" I wanted women across the globe to find their confidence in the only One that matters and not look to those empty spaces like media, other women, and the like. We are so much more than we give ourselves credit for, and I wanted ladies to begin believing in themselves; seeing themselves for their true value and worth. I preached this expression any chance I got. It became my passion. Yet, it has taken me years since grasping this saying to find my own confidence. "Such confidence we have through Christ toward God. Not that we are adequate in ourselves to consider anything as coming from ourselves, but our adequacy is from God, who also made us adequate as servants of a new covenant, not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the le...

"I am the gate. If anyone enters through Me, he will be saved. He will come in and go out and find pasture. The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I have come that they may have life, and have it in all its fullness." John 10:9-10 The hubs and I started watching a new show on Netflix. The wife in the show is pretty miserable the majority of the time. To some extent, I can't blame her. She's been through the ringer. However, she is so despondent all of the entire time that I may need to throw in the towel. If I look out my door through a certain lens, I may see something similar in people: misery. It seems people are angrier, fussier, worried more, downtrodden, full of fear and anxiety these days. We tend to hear, "life is hard," more often than, "life is good." So, when life is going great in your neck of the woods, it may be difficult to enjoy it. Just me? Maybe I am alone in this. I went to look out the window and saw my husban...

I set all the pieces out in an organized fashion. I pulled at the infamous allen wrench that IKEA offers to put anything and everything together. Allen wrenches are the duct tape of IKEA: they can fix anything. So, there I sat with all my piles of pieces and then I opened my Bible for the directions. Say what?!?! Who would open their Bible to find directions for a piece of furniture from IKEA? I feel like this is life right now. With all its chaos and racism and craziness, I feel like I am trying to put together a piece of furniture from IKEA using directions from my Bible. I want to beat my head against the wall. I want to throw all the pieces in the air and walk away. I want to give up. I want to yell. I am immensely frustrated while deeply committed to figuring it all out. But, the directions don't match the situation. As Christians, we believe we should be able to open our Bibles and have all the answers. Unfortunately, God doesn't always work that way. Yes, the Bib...

Some of the best advice I have ever heard is: No one can say what you have to say the way you say it. We all have a voice. We all have something to say; something to offer this great, big, wide world. This place needs to hear your voice. You may express it through music, singing, writing, vlogging, posting pictures, taking pictures, painting, speaking, working in the corporate world, working in the home. We all were designed to share our voice. It's in our wiring; our DNA. You are a creative whether you recognize it or not. It's taken me almost 40 years to find my voice. It has taken me a very long time to find comfort and confidence in my voice. I had to watch a lot of people do what I wanted to do until I finally decided to get off the sidelines and jump into the game. I watch and follow a few moms that have made careers out of their social media platforms. Their messages are all very similar: every day moms surviving the mess of motherhood and having a good laugh alon...

"Life was not meant to be lived alone. Life was meant to be shared." Surly the squirrel, The Nut Job Got the boys off to their first day of school. Had my gym clothes on and water bottle filled; to-do list in my hand. Picked up my phone only to receive a text the moment I placed it in my hand. "Happy first day of school! Y'all want to meet for breakfast/coffee or lunch today?!...to celebrate, Lol" (all the praise hands) The text responses came in. Everyone could meet. I hadn't responded yet. I wanted to meet my friends. I also wanted to relish in my freedom working out and running errands sans kiddos. I knew in my heart that I needed my friends; especially today. I walked into the coffee shop and was greeted with a hug, card, and flowers. My tribe is good, y'all. These women knew I needed a little TLC given the fact that my eldest just walked into his first day of middle school. My heart and my mind were in so many places. I needed my friends to...

I thought I was okay with rejection. I really did. I usually can take a harsh word or being eliminated from things or groups. Ya, it hurts. But, I typically can get over things fairly quick. And then my husband entered the equation. A few weeks ago I found an opportunity to get another master's degree; an opportunity that seemed to fit our family and my schedule perfectly. I have talked about getting this degree since my early twenties. It's about time I put my money where my mouth is, so to speak. I called my husband while I was filling out the application because I needed some information he had and I didn't. He was traveling home from being out of town for a few days so when I asked for the info, I kind of shocked him with my new venture. He got home shortly after our phone conversation and plopped down next to me on the love seat in my office. He started pushing me and questioning me about this master's program. If I'm being honest, it was quite irritating. ...

Ten years ago my husband and I loaded everything we owned into a moving van. We strapped our 15-month old into his car seat and headed 3,000 miles east to plant new roots in the middle of the country. I had a deep longing to stay at home with our son and moving was the only way we could live this lifestyle. Everything I had known, most of my identity, was stripped away from me the moment we pulled out of the driveway. No longer was I a teacher. I had graduated from college so student-life was a thing of the past. My family and friends all stayed behind so I had to find a new village. The only part of me that remained was wife and mom. Two things I cherish(ed) but I wasn't used to them being the only things that defined me. Transition. Change. It's the hard stuff. Flash-forward and I have been a stay-at-home mom and wife for ten years. I have found my identity in this role and gotten comfy. I dappled in photography and taught preschool for a split-second, but, the majority of ...

I love Pinterest. I really do. It's such a pretty world. I love looking at the reipes and decor. I fantasize about adding barn doors to every open space in my home. Pinterest gets a bad rap. I get it. It's difficult to try and live up to what seems like an unattainable world. But, what if we looked at Pinterest a little different? What if, instead of chasing perfection, we chase our best? I dapple in many things. I have a creative side that needs to get out and it shows in various capacities. I like to explore home interiors. I am a really great at organizing. I can take a pretty decent picture. And, I love to write. The kitchen is my happy place and I love to create food masterpieces. I find a lot of my passion and fulfillment when I am doing those things. When I write, I feel energized. Changing decor in our home excites me even if it's just putting out a fresh bouquet of flowers. I adore capturing raw moments of my boys on film and looking back relishing in the shots I...

I received an email from our neighborhood site. Don't we all love our neighborhood sites? It's a place where crazy can brew. I must say, our little corner is pretty mild and full of more support and kindness than drama. Until recently. One of the things that drew us to our neighborhood was the look of the community. The shared places were gorgeous, beautifully maintained, and inviting. Recently, however, those spaces have lacked some tender loving care. A few have taken to our site to ask advice, not bring drama, to the situation. There are some houses that need some love, as well, and our HOA management company is aware (gotta love an HOA). Everyone seemed supportive of one another most neighbors offering assistance to those whose yards have overgrown not to be rude or demeaning, but because I truly feel our neighbors really do care about one another. Well, one neighbor did not take that so kindly. She was very angry and wished ill-will on the "tattle-tale" who j...