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Heavy

The flags. They are down again. Hanging halfway down on the pole looking sullen. Sometimes I wonder if we should just leave them at half mass. Why even bother raising them back up? Tragedy seems to strike so often these days that we might as well just leave them in the halfway state. I think of the first responders having to walk into that church, that concert venue, that tragedy. Their lives, like the victims laying motionless, forever changed. My nephew is a fire fighter. One of my best friends is married to a fireman. I have numerous friends married to police officers. Their lives, too, are changed immeasurably.

Senseless acts of violence try to rob my hope daily. A lack of understanding and unfathomable circumstances twist and turn in my soul. A darkness creeps in and leaves behind a vast heaviness. The whole earth feels like she's gasping for breath; like she's on a ventilator.

I walked up the street and saw the flags. Worship music playing in my ear buds, I told God I couldn't do this anymore. I can't wake up to hearing of another tragedy taking lives far too soon. Children experiencing things they should never know about. Parents suffering something so deep they will never fully recover.

Heavy.

It's all just too heavy.

And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying: “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man, and He will live with them. They will be His people, and God Himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the former things have passed away.” And the One seated on the throne said, “Behold, I make all things new.” Revelation 21:4-5

The Book of Revelation. Most run away from it. Some run towards it screeching about wrath, burning, and eternal damnation. No one really wants to talk about Revelation. It seems mysterious and disastrous; too difficult to understand. I have studied the book before and just finished studying it this past year. I wanted to understand. I longed to find answers to the code. But, I didn't. I did find something, though.

Hope.

Every morning I read two to four pages of commentary and the Scripture that coincided. Some came out of Revelation but, if you've ever studied the book before, you will find that in order to grasp Revelation, you have to look at many other books of the Bible. I would shut my books, exhale, and realize I my understanding of this complicated book came down to one thing.

Hope.

It didn't matter if I understood the symbolism in Revelation. What matter was that I understood hope. I read about diseases and disasters and wars and how people were going to go crazy. Sounds familiar, right? But, I also read about hope. Things are going to happen. Bad things. Hurtful things. Unfathomable things. But, hope will never fade; a steady friend that never leaves our side.

This world is gasping. The breaths are labored. It doesn't matter where you live. We all feel it. Every where we turn we are being robbing of something. The thief (John 10:10) seems like he is winning. His loot, bountiful. Yet, there is one thing he has yet to take from us.

Hope.

We may experience hopeless circumstances but we are never hopeless. Life may feel like a load of bricks laid upon our chest, but we still have breath. Hope is never lost. It was there in the beginning and will be there in the end. The enemy can try to steal every bit of life out from under us but he will never get our hope because it resides in an unbreakable place: Jesus.

Just like the Book of Revelation, we will never understand the brokenness or complexities of this world. We are desperate to understand, but we never will and that's okay because we will always have the one thing that sustains and that is hope: hope in Jesus who carries it all.

Hope...
a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen.

I am sustained when the world seems heavy because I am filled with a spirit of expectation knowing that my desire will happen: He WILL wipe every tear. He WILL make all things new. He WILL restore us. He WILL heal us. He WILL because He is HOPE.

Hope.

It's the one thing that cannot be taken because hope=Jesus.

So we’re not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There’s far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can’t see now will last forever.
2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Love & Blessings,
Meg

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